Sexploration

Becky is currently at a gig, but she said she's going to come over after it but only for about an hour because she is working early tomorrow. She said she's not going to have time to mess around, so when she turns up we're not going to speak, we're just going straight upstairs. I told her to prove that she likes giving blowjobs now (she enver used to) and she said she will. Looking forward to it, athough she might not be any good.

It'd be awesome if it happened like that. Perhaps after a bit of a blowjob I'll have sex with her, finish up on her boobs, then let her clean her self up and get out without speaking to her. I wonder why people seem to be into that.

I hope it turns out like I imagine in my head. I'll let you know.

Six and a half years ago I was getting ready to move to California (yes, this is a weird way to start a story). My friend Dan told me that a girl he'd spoken to online for a while had written me a poem because I was leaving. That was quite weird by itself because I think I had spoken to her on the phone once, and that was it. Her name is Allie.

Allie lives about 20 miles from me. We have never met each other, and she is engaged to a man she has been seeing for 2 years. He proposed to her on Oblivion at Alton Towers. He lives about 300 miles away from both of us at the moment.

While I was in California I spoke to her a bit via MSN, but I was deeply in love with my girlfriend over there the whole time. Allie would often make our conversations quite explicit, and I must admit now that I really enjoyed that fact.

Anyway, we stopped speaking to each other in 2004 because we just stopped having anything to say, etc. The other month I saw her lsited as one of Dan's Facebook friends, so I thought I'd add her and say hello. We had a brief conversation, and then that was that over with.

Yesterday I was working from home, and I had Facebook open. She posted a status update saying "Allie has taken the day off today, just because she can." BecauseI was off too I just clicked "Like" underneath it and carried on with my day for a minute. Then I got a notification saying she'd replied, then another saying she'd commented on one of my status updates. Well, I replied, and she replied over and over again for a while. I decided to say hi on Facebook Chat instead of the constant Facebook comment back-and-forth.

After a minute or two of talking on Facebook Chat I suggested MSN instead because Facebook Chat's not ideal. So I added her on MSN and we started to chat on there for a while. Before long she was talking about finding her webcam. When she found it she invited me to watch her chat to me on MSN. I accepted and watched for a while as we spoke. Then she suggested that I show her my webcam, so I did.

We chatted about al lsorts of things until I remembered that a few weeks ago I'd stumbled on some old MSN chat logs from when we used to speak in 2003-2004. I found them again and started quoting bits and pieces to her. There was some pretty obvious flirting going on in the old chat logs, and some very sexual things said between the both of us. It was weird because neither of us particularly remembered our conversations being so dirty.

At some point the conversation got disconnected, so I started it up again, but I clicked video call, instead of just webcam by mistake. Unfortunately she could hear me, but I couldn't hear her. After that she suggested using Skype instead. When we got on Skype everything was working.

We started out just chatting about random stuff and before we knew it w'd been talking for 3 hours. Allie had to go to make some food and a few other bits and pieces, but said we'd talk later.

I wasn't expecting to talk for as long the second time we started, but we ended up talking about all sorts of things. A lot of it was to do with sex, which is a personal favourite topic of mine, and apparently hers. We were talking for 7 and a half hours the second time! We planned all sorts of ridiculous things that I'm not sure if she was joking about or not. She's going on holiday in December and she suggested that I should pick up the spare ticket because someone cancelled. I said I was going away in just over a week and she should take one of those spare tickets. She did seem interested, but perhaps was unsure of how serious I was. It's weird how people can umm and ahh for so long and never end up making a decision, but oh well.

I can't believe we spent 10 and a half hours talking to each other. It was really a lot of fun, and I hope to spend some time talking to her later on.

One thing I did find a bit unusual is that during that entire time she only spoke to her fiancé in one text message. I find that quite unusual...

Anyway, I don't think anything will happen with Allie, but it was such an awesome day that I just felt like writing it down.

Becky came over again the night before last after she'd finished at a pub quiz. We watched a bit of TV on the sofa together and nothing really happened that whole time. At one point we kissed a little bit, but then we stopped doing anything for about an hour.

After a while it was decided we should both get some sleep, so Becky gathered her things and went to the front door. As she was turning the key to unlock the door, I spun her around and pushed her against the door and started to kiss her. She was surprised at first, but quickly started kissing me back.

I started to take off  all clothes south of her waist and then took my own off too. Still against the door I carried on kissing her and crouched down (I'm nearly a foot taller than she is) and tried to find the right angle. With a bit of help I managed to get everything in order and started to fuck her against the front door.

It felt pretty strange to be ahving sex right there, and I did have an urge to open the front door and carry on, but I didn't.

After a couple of minutes Becky couldn't stand on her tip-toes any more, so without stopping kissing we moved back to the sofa and carried on having sex there, with me on top, of course.

A few minutes in I was completely covered in sweat, and my back was well and truly covered in scratches. Several times I got quite close to finishing, but stopped in time so I could carry on.

We stayed in pretty much the same position the whole time we were having sex. I got warned against getting any cum on her face, which didn't matter in the end because I couldn't seem to get close again after stopping myself so many times. I tried everything I could think of. No matter how fast and hard I fucked her I couldn't get close to finishing. I can normally control it quite well, but I just couldn't seem to reach the point of no return, so after a hell of a lot of trying I told her I'd have to stop. I was literally dripping with sweat and I was extremely out of breath from the massive effort.

The whole thing would probably be a lot easier and nicer if she made any effort during sex, but she doesn't.

I'm beginning to think that I'll probably get her to give me a blowjob, which she never used to do 3 years ago, make sure I cum on her face because she says she doesn't want it, and then not bother seeing her any more.

That sounds really horrible, but I'm not overly bothered. She's too lazy during sex for my liking, so I might as well do the things I want to do since I already do everything she wants.

I went out to a gig on Sunday night with a friend. After the gig I went back to my friend's house because I had too much to drink, and his house was considerably closer than mine. Before I went to sleep on the sofa I played around with Facebook on my phone. I added a girl that I met in the bar that night, and then I also added a girl I used to see 3 years ago, but haven't spoken to since then.

This girl from 3 years ago is called Becky. The circumstances of our original get-together are a bit stupid, and bad. My friend really liked her, I had a girlfriend, she had a boyfriend. The day before my girlfriend was first coming to stay over Becky came over and we had sex. The next day I met up with my girlfriend and we went away together for the weekend. Becky broke up with her boyfriend right away. Before too long my girlfriend and I broke up and Becky and I started to see more of each other. My friend found out, obviously, and he was not very pleased about the situation.

Anyway, that was the beginning of a summer of high drama among my friends and I. Things have changed quite a lot since then, but Becky and I didn't speak at all. There was no need to. We ended on quite bad terms, and neither of us wanted much to do with each other.

Anyway, one huge digression aside, I added Becky on Facebook, and she confirmed it almost straight away. She sent me a message a couple of minutes later, and i replied. We did the whole "how have you been?" thing for a while, then my battery was running out, so I told her, and went to sleep.

At work after a few hours of sleep we carried on where we left off with the messages. Eventually the conversation reached a point where it was agreed that she would come over and watch a film at my house when I got home from work, but nothing would happen outside catching up, and watching a film.

While we were watching the first film I said something mildly sarcastic and she took that as an opportunity to hit me with a cushion. I hit her back with another cushion, and then we carried on watching the film. This happened a few times while we were watching the second film, but she also started to lean over and poke me, or tickle me or whatever, and  Iwas doing the same back. Basically we were just making excuses to touch each other.

During the third film she decided to lie down on the sofa. At some point she decided to move so her face was on the other end of the sofa to me, so I took a cushion, put it on her hip, and lay down on it. We carried on poking each other a bit, and then things progressed to thumb wrestling, which is basically just an excuse for holding hands. Then we didn't bother making excuses, and just held hands.

Becky asked if I had enough space, and then she moved slightly aside so I could move a bit further up towards her face. I stayed like that for a few minutes, while we were still holding hands. Then I took my hands and started to trace lines along her arms, her back, her ear...

After a couple of minutes of that I decided to lean in and kiss her. She kissed me back, and then there was some sort of release of a lot of tension and we both started to kiss each other with a lot more urgency. It was very much like something you see in the movies.

After a minute or two of that we were basically writhing around with each other on the sofa. I pointed out that there wasn't very much room, and she agreed. I asked if we should move to somewhere with a bit more space, and she said yes, so we went upstairs to my bedroom.

As soon as we had stopped in the middle of the bedroom we started kissing again. I took off her top and we kissed some more before we moved onto the bed. We stopped kissing briefly while we finished getting undressed and Becky commented on how weird it was to be doing the same thing as 3 years ago. She said it wasn't weird in a bad way, but I agreed it was a weird situation to be in again.

Since the last time I saw her she'd had a breast reduction. It was fairly hard to spot the difference over 3 years, but they still seemed pretty damn big to me.

I moved Becky further onto the bed while we were still kissing, and then moved around so I was on top of her. I pushed slightly inside her and she gasped, which is a lovely thing to hear! I slowly pushed in a bit further, pulled out, pushed in a bit further a few times and then pushed all the rest of the way in at once.

Straight away she was moaning and started to dig her nails into my back. We were still kissing as much as possible while still managing to breathe every now and then.

For the entire time we didn't change position more than a little bit. I was on top, and I was in control of what was happening, and she liked it like that. A few times she was moaning really loud, or letting out a bit of a scream, which I'm sure the neighbours appreciated at about 2am.

After around 45 minutes I was basically far too hot and out of breath. I had to stop for a minute to breathe, and get a drink. By this point Becky had come a few times, so I didn't feel bad for stopping. When I got back into the bedroom from getting a drink it hit me that it was almost 3am, and I'd only had 4 or 5 hours of sleep the night before. I was really tired, hot, and breathing heavily still.

Becky suggested that we stop, and I thought about whether to continue or not. In the end I decided to be sensible, which I sort of regret, but also makes me quite glad. I didn't get a chance to finish what I'd started, and she certainly didn't offer to help out, because she's an incredibly selfish person to sleep with, but I was glad just to let her out of the house so I could get 4 hours of sleep before getting up for work.

I've told Valerie that we won't be doing anything together any more after the first time. She's not someone I want to spend my time with. She always used to make it hard work, and I don't want that any more. Now that I've done that I'm left with only a few chances with other girls right now.

Linzi didn't speak to me for a couple of weeks until this lunch time, when she randomly started texting every minute to see if I wanted to go see her tonight with our mutual friends. Unfortunately we're at a party, so we can't go. She then invited me out on another night, which I would go to, but our friends can't make it, so it might not be such a great idea.

Sally has been planning to come and see me for a week or so now, but she's just received some bad news about her mum that emans she might not be able to make it after all. She still wants to, if only to get away from the situation she's in at the moment for a few days. We've spoken on the phone a couple of times, and there's been a hell of a lot of talk about what we'd do to each other when we met, which is pretty awesome. I'll go into more detail about that when I have more time.

I've found myself thinking of Lisa quite a lot recently. I really enjoyed the time I spent with her, and I think I'd like it even more now, but she has a serious relationship, and I don't want to be the one to break something like that up. That doesn't stop me from wishing they would just break up though. Ugh. It's so frustrating because I like talking to her, but I always end up saying these ridiculous things to her about spending time together and blah blah blah.

So yeah, I basically haven't gone anywhere since I became single, other than that one mistaken misadventure with Valerie, and it kind of sucks. I was hoping I'd at least have someone to spend some time with in a non-relationship, but as it stands I am basically by myself.

Last night i ended up getting a lift home from a pub with Valerie. Well, she came and picked me up from the pub. It was weird to explain to my friends (who know her) that I wouldn't be getting a lift back with them because she was coming. I got a very disapproving look from Dan's girlfriend because she knows that Valerie has a boyfriend.

Valerie came to my house and we sat downstairs for ages just talking about her boyfriend, and our history. Apparently she and her boyfriend don't really get on very well, and he doesn't want to have sex very much because she's not a "skinny blonde" and he's also constantly trying to get her to settle down and have kids.

So basically we ended up kissing fairly late at night, and things very slowly progressed to the point where she was lying down in front of me on the sofa and I was running my fingers all over her and kissing her neck and her ear. At one point when her top had been pulled down out of the way she complained she was a bit cold, so I suggested going upstairs to where there is a bed and a proper blanket. She agreed, so we went upstairs.

It didn't take long for things to get back to how they were downstairs. Before too long we were taking off our clothes and kissing and breathing very heavily.

After some persuasion Valerie got on top of me and starting kissing and lightly scratching down my chest and stomach. Before too long she was below my waist. She teased for a while, kissing around my lower stomach and the top of my legs, and then she licked all the way from the base to the tip of my cock. She did that a couple of times and then I got impatient and put my hand on the back of her head and made it clear what I was after.

After a couple of minutes of giving me a blowjob Valerie moved forwards putting my cock between her boobs (which have grown to a 34E now) and basically just teased me a bit more like that.

When she moved over next to me on the bed I put on a condom and then rolled over and on top of her. Pushing into her seemed really tight. It felt great to be starting to have sex with someone for the first time in 3 months, and I could tell she was enjoying everything too.

After a few seconds I started to move in and out of her a bit faster and a bit harder. It felt great. It was ncie to look down and see her really enjoying it, and her boobs moving in time with my motions. Valerie has her arms around me and was starting to scratch my back and shoulders a bit stronger than she was doing to my chest earlier. I remembered that she liked to be held down, so I grabbed her hands and held them behind her head and started to be a bit more rough.

A few times I had to stop completely because I was so close the whole time, but Valerie was just pleased that it was lasting for more than 5 minutes, apparently. In total the sex lasted for around 30-45 minutes. Nowhere near the record, but not a bad start after the off-season.

Now it's over with I'm seriously doubting I'll bother with Valerie again. Being with her had the unexpected effect of reminding me of her negative points over her positive points. She's not the kind of person I want to be spending my time with, and the whole situation is pretty bad, so I think I'll try to keep my distance. That being said, I did enjoy having sex...

I mentioned a girl called Sally quite a long time ago on here. I had a fairly lengthy conversation with her last night after not speaking for quite a while.

During the conversation it was suggested that she we should meet up before the end of the year. She lives about an hour and a half away from me, so we've enver met before, although we've spoken a lot online and on the phone over the last 2 and a half years.

Sally drives, and she wanted to get away from where she is for a while, so I suggested that she should come and visit me. Well, she agreed, and so now we're just arranging a good time for it to happen. Hopefully it'll be sooner rather than later.

I don't know what kind of stuff she's interested in any more, but if she's anything like how she was then it'll be a pretty awesome few days...

Fingers crossed.

As I posted yesterday I was meeting up with Lisa and our mututal friend for some drinks last night.

After only a short amount of time our friend left and it was just Lisa and me for the rest of the night. We had a fair few drinks, and it still doesn't take many for her to get fairly drunk.

We spent a great deal of time, from very early on in the evening, talking about the time we spent together, and mostly the sex we had. We were both very flattering to each other, which is always nice, and there was a huge amount of sexual tension. She mentioned being on anti-depressants and said they caused her to not want sex very much with her boyfriend. She certainly seemed to enjoy talking about it though.

We had a chat about the conversation that caused Lisa and I to stop seeing each other. I wrote about it on this blog about 2 and a half years ago. She asked if I could see us together as a couple, only a few days or weeks after us agreeing that we would just be friends with benefits. Based on that conversation I gave some half-assed answer because I didn't want to fuck up what we had to try to get what I wanted. I really wanted to say yes to her back then. I found out last night that she really wanted me to say yes too.

It was so frustrating. Knowing that I could have had things how I wanted them all that time ago. Who knows how it would have turned out? It was a major fork in the road of our lives, and we took one turn because we were both too scared to admit we wanted to take the other.

After a bit more talking about our sexual exploits Lisa said this to me "If you were willing, and I was single, then we'd be on a bus back to your house right now," which made things even more frustrating. I replied with "if you were single and interested then we'd be in a taxi to my house right now!"

After a bit more talking I was a little bit drunk, so I apologised. When she asked what for I put my hand on the side of her face and kissed her on the cheek. I wanted to kiss her on the lips, but she mistook my lean as if I was about to whisper anything so I had to abort my original plan at the last minute. She knew what I'd had in mind afterwards though, and she said there was no need to apologise. Nothing else particularly untoward happened for the rest of the night. Just a lot of talk about sex, relationships, and what things could have been like between us.

It was rather unusual to get right into conversations like that with someone after not seeing them for ages, but it was also really nice. Hopefully we'll meet up again one day soon.

Getting started hasn't been quite as successful as I had hoped.

Cath
A few friends and I went out the other night and I did end up kissing Cath, but only because our friends were kissing each other and we didn't want to be left out. Pretty sure she wanted to do it for other reasons, but she also wants a boyfriend, so it's less likely that I'll get involved.

Valerie
I started getting messages from Valerie again basically as soon as she noticed I was single. She has been going out with her boyfriend for a year or so now, and this whole situation seems very familiar to how it was when I first started writing this blog. She spoke to me yesterday and was basically looking for me to convince her to cheat on her boyfriend with me. She says she doesn't want to be with him any more, and they're growing apart, and argue a lot, etc.

I told her that if they're growing apart then she should at least talk to him about it before just randomly going off and cheating on him. It was very strange to be talking myself out of sex, when all I really wanted to do was say "ok, come over now." It made me feel quite a bit better about myself though. The urge is still there to do it, and I'm weak enough that if she suggests it again then I'll probably do it. Just hope she sorts things out with her boyfriend first. Don't like being that guy.

Lisa
I got a message from Lisa, who was also around when I started writing this blog. She was asking a few folks if we wanted to go out for a drink. I'm good friends with her ex, but obviously I also have history with Lisa. You might think it would be really awkward, but it's not any more. Lisa's ex, my friend, will be joining Lisa and I for some drinks after work tonight. Lisa also has a boyfriend that she lives with, so nothing is going to happen. I just thought I'd mention it while I was on the topic of random people contacting me as soon as I became single.

Linzi
I'm not really sure what's going on with Linzi. I text her too much. I like her a lot, but I don't want a relationship just yet. She's still in a messed up sort of relationship, and she's not very happy. Sometimes she doesn't bother texting me back, and I think she's not interested, and then she'll randomly text me and we strike up a conversation again. I keep having to resist the urge of texting her all the time, and also I have to resist the urge to ask her out somewhere.

I have a message typed on my phone, saved as a draft from last night. It's basically a message asking if she wants to hang out somewhere one day and catch up. I feel ridiculous having even typed it, but I also really want to send it to her.

I just don't know what I'd be like if she said no. To be honest I'm not sure what to make of it if she said yes. Blah!

Now I'm single I've decided I should come up with a list of things I want to do before I am back in a serious relationship. Some of these could happen while I'm in a relationship, but I'm not 100% sure about them, so I'll aim to get them done before then.

Have a threesome with two girls

This one is fairly predictable. I've had a couple of threesomes before, but never one with two girls. It'll probably be easier with two girls who don't love me, rather than someone I'm in a relationship with and some other girl. If I had a girlfriend that was bi-sexual I obviously wouldn't complain. It's easy to find a girl who will say she wants a threeesome with another girl, but it's much more difficult to actually get that thing to happen.

I don't want the girls to both only be there for me. I want them to enjoy it with each other as much as they do with me. I don't just want to take it in turns having sex with one and then the other. I want them to do things to each, and maybe even sometimes I'm left out and I can just watch. I want to have sex with two girls who want to have sex with each other.

One night stand

I've had a one-night-stand before, sort of. I met up with a girl I had spoken to for a while and we had sex in a hotel room, and I haven't seen her since the next morning, but I knew her already. I've spoken to her online since then. The kind of thing I want to happen in this case is to find a totally random girl in a club or something, go back to her house, have sex, and then I leave in the morning before she wakes up. A proper one night stand.

Become a motherfucker

This is a bit of a strange one, but I think it would be a bit interesting. I've never had sex with a person who has a child before. I've had a blowjob from someone with a kid, but that's as far as it went. There's no particular reason for this one, just want to earn the title.

Have sex in interesting places again

My ex-girlfriend of a few years ago and I used to have sex all over the place. In the car parked on the driveway, or a random street, on the landing while people were in the house downtairs, in a swimming pool full of people, in the middle of a camping site in the woods in the middle of the night, on top of a national monument in America in broad daylight while people were below... I want more stories like that.

I can't currently remember the last time I had sex out of the house. It's probably around 5 and a half years ago now, not counting getting a bit of a blowjob on a couple of random streets one night. That's very sad.

Get started

That's pretty much my entire list for now. I'm sure I'll think of additional items at some point though. For now I just kind of want to get started having sex again. Pretty sure I could achieve this by the end of the day. Not convinced it's such a great idea though.